All the Lonely People Pt. II

One of my friends- one of those near and dear people to me- told me that after 15 years.... It's splitsville. I am so saddened by this- I'm not totally surprised, but I guess the optimistic part of me hoped for the best. I really thought they could make it. They have been through so many hard times together and have made it through. I've always admired what they had- Seeing two people who both really had it rough growing up- and seeing them actually make it. They're both so wonderfully likeable. (My friend is, hands down, one of the funniest people that I know. He has the uncanny ability to make even the worst situation seem, well, funny.) And even through this trying time, he hasn't lost his sense of humor. I wish so badly that I could sit down with her and tell her that the grass isn't greener and that life after divorce is not something to be taken lightly.

When at mass this weekend, the priest gave a special marriage blessing and asked all of the married people to stand. Such moments are mortifying. I looked around me... There was me. There was the guy whose 30 something year marriage ended a couple of years ago sitting with his daughter. There was the guy I knew in high school who just split with his high school sweetheart sitting with his kids. There was my friend's sister who just moved back from Chicago following a very, very nasty divorce. And then there was the rest of the congregation...standing...being blessed. I felt low there for a couple of minutes, but then I looked at my fellow divorcees and felt grateful that we're all still there. We haven't completely given up the faith, obviously.

I went to the track today and saw yet another recently divorced acquaintance from high school. I watched him run, knowing the rumors I've heard...knowing the pain he's in.

As I walked, I thought of all of these things. I thought of all of these families and of all of this pain. It doesn't seem to make sense how there can be so many lonely people in the world, so many selfish people in the world. We are all so imperfect and so very fragile.

When my friend told me about his day yesterday, I just wanted to cry...because I've been there. I know what that kind of lonliness is like, what that kind of emptiness is like. He doesn't deserve that. No one does.

I really can't make sense of any of it.